happy new year !

Dear 2011,

I have had a whirlwind year. Yes I did.
There's so much that have happened that I could not remember any to list down.
I swear the list would go on and on and on.

But what I do know, is that I have had THE greatest time of my life and also THE worst.
All in one year.
I'm half happy that we're all moving on yet quite sad with the fact that, I could no longer turn back time and undo the things that have happened.
I know I couldn't have prevented it. But at least I wish I hoped that I could.

Times have certainly changed, and we have all grown up in our own ways.
Our perspective towards everything else has also changed too.

Life has its way of shaping our road but it still depends on how we're going to walk on it.
How we decide to take each step further that brings us to where we are.

I have learned so much in such a short time.
To maneuver myself through all the hurt and pain.
Through each obstacle, and each rain.
To stand beyond and look further than what I could see.

I also wanna thank to those who have been there through the bad times with me.
And also through each good times we've spent together.
Followed by each bullshit you've ever put me through.
Because without it, I wouldn't have known how unworthy you are.
Without it, I wouldn't have been able to learn of your character, and I wouldn't have made myself much stronger.

So thank you.
And I am also grateful to my friends who have been my shoulder.
Sorry if your ears are bleeding. haha.    :)
Sometimes, you save me when I am truly at the point of breaking.

So dear 2011.
To sum it all up. It has been a great year.
And it will always be that way while I still live.          :D

different

"I find it kinda funny, and I find it kinda sad. "

- mad world                      

its weird how some people tries to stop themselves from doing something they shouldn't.
but ended up doing it anyway. 


how one should fall for another but refrain from it for all the screaming reasons. 
reasons that were good enough. 
why then began to fall in the first place. 


sometimes, it feels like holding your breathe for a very long time.
and you can't let the air out of your lungs. 
every moment, you drown in your own breath. 
and every second you drown, you resurface again. 


it's like dying and then brought back to life.


only it's being done a thousand times over. 




and you realize how more alive you are. 
that you can feel every stab of pain in your heart. 
and you wanna cry, and run, and scream all at the same time. 


so much is kept inside that you want to burst out and just let it all go.
but you can't. 


there are consequences to everything you do. 
one move will then lead to another. 
like how dominoes fall and then hit another. 


we can't do as we please, because there are others who live too. 
and we can't change things as we please, because the world does not only evolve around you.


i no longer believe in miracles
when it comes to love. 
and when it comes to me. 


being in love is like placing yourself in someone else's hand.
and that they may decide to protect you and love you and keep you safe.
and that they may also decide to just break you one day. 

New year?

Hi there ! 

It's another boring week with nothing to do but to stay home and rot away.

Taking the oppurtunity to get as much rest as possible before the new semester starts.

Mum has been sick lately, vomiting and sleeping all the time.

Went to see an acupuncture doctor last night to help ease the pain.

Anyways, new year is coming !

:)

Hope everyone had a great 2011. 

CHINA !

went to a few different provinces in China. Couldn't remember most of them because throughout the whole trip, I was blur to where we all were going.
It felt like I was being pushed the whole time we were there.

The weather was great except for the last few days when the wind started to blow.

HOME ARCHIVE ASK

Some pictures taken there. It was an 8 days trip so all the pictures are not posted up.
There's just too many.
Here are some of my favourites.

The province is named after the flower above called gui hwa.    :)

update !

My blog has been so dead for the past two weeks.
Was busy with exams and then immediately after that, left to China for a vacation.

Will promise promise to update soon !

New set of teeth !

makeover from shu umuera a few weeks back. 

didn't really like the outcome despite how I think highly of their products.

Went and did scaling for my teeth today. 

Dentist decided to do some filling to fill in the gaps between my front tooth. 

Is not THAT perfect, infact, they looked weird because now it's bigger than the rest of my teeth. 

But I am SUPER happy with the outcome. 

I had that gap between my two front teeth all my life. 

Now no more ! 

I can smile all I want. WHEEEE !

                
 

Before and after photos. 

If you can look closely at my two front teeth. 

NO MORE GAPS !

Sister said I have bunny teeth now. 

-____________-

At least I can smile without trying to hard to cover the gap.

I can feel it in my bones, gimme sympathy after all of this is gone

New addiction to an old song.

Started playing lyrics legend on a friend's ipad and this song got stuck with me.

Another weekend full of undone chores waiting for me to complete them.
Leaving for China this Saturday.
Can't tell if I was excited or not.

I have yet to bathe my dog, clean the house.
Wash my clothes
Study for finals
Pack for China
Commi on Wednesday followed by work.
Exams on Thursday and Friday.

Then leaving at 3 in the morning to China for a family holiday.
My relative is coming down on Tuesday. I am doomed !

Anyways, more interesting updates will come soon. I hope.
Sister bought an iphone yesterday.
New mission now: get parents to buy iphone for me. 

Baby, why do you abandone me

I miss my poor baby. Gonna send it to the hospital soon !

Finals are starting tomorrow and here I am typing away. 

I am just so caught up with the whirlwind of events lately. 

Can't believe the term is ending and term 6 starts next year. 

It's absolutely crazy how time flies. 

25th anniversary dinner 

CLICK ON IT !!!

and read.                           :)

Have never felt prouder in my life. 

Spot me !

Another was is upcoming

Everyone knows the infamous puss in the movie shrek right?

Watched Puss in Boots at MBO cinemas in Subang Parade last Wednesday.

Went all the way to Times Square in the morning trying to get my bag fixed.

Total waste of time. 

It wasn't worth it. 

Now I am in a dilemma. 

Anyways, the movie was surprisingly entertaining.

(sorry, I didn't like shrek very much)

But it cracked me up throughout the whole movie.

And I had fun. *surprisingly*

I think throughout the whole movie, my favourite part was .....

SO ADORABLE !!!

Finals are coming up close. 

And its another exhausting week. 

I feel like another war is coming up soon, and this war cannot be fought by using the mind. 

It's like the next wave pushing over the tide again. 

And I better brace myself for this one. 

It never ceases to end I guess. 

The wave comes and goes, and starts all over again. 

Reality was never so simple. 

And that is a fact I have to live with for the rest of my life.

There are some people, I know I am not up against. 

But I live my own life, and they live their own. 

End of story. * i can't believe i'm getting worked up over this*

Can you hear my heart breaking?

I did something I regret. My mistake could be fixed, its just a matter of time and money.
If only I were willing to spend those.

I am beyond low, and I am feeling so down in the dumps right.
Wishing for the millionth time that I could rewind everything.
But I just can't.

No I'm not talking about losing a lover.
I'm talking about my handbag.

(-_____________-)

I didn't say I was talking about me being heartbroken over a guy. gotcha.
Anyways, I feel like this hurts a thousand times more than breaking up.
I am literally shattered.
Can anyone recommend a good shop that fixes all types of leather in the shortest amount of time?
PRETTY PLEASE !

I would like to send in my handbag.    :(

One step Closer

Am trying my best to blog everyday.
GAH !
Faithful blog, I won't abandon you any longer.
It's been ages since I was an avid blogger.
All that I've seen and felt, I'd share it.

I guess time forbade me to do so now.
Time is being so difficult, and it's hiding in all the wrong places. Running away.

For the sake of uplifting my blog, thus bringing it back to existence, I promise to post interesting photos.    :)

So here's some eye designs I did for a dinner but in the end, it was not required. 

It was suppose to be done on the host of the event, but we didn't need one after much discussion. 

Politics... *sighs*

Will be back soon for more updates. 

Stay tuned !

ipoc & grc

hello there !

 

Some of the pictures I managed to snag from ericca's album.  :)

Artwork I've done during the IPOC & GRC conference dinner. 

Was supposed to be a masquerade theme. 

But we were low on budget to buy masks so we'd decided to draw them on. 

Spend almost 3 hours drawing 21 people's faces.

Was quite a challenge.

Went home with a sore ache in my right hand and muscle cramps.

But after I looked at the photos, it was all worth it.

I love the fact that they all look so beautiful.

Technically their all the same design, but their faces brought the lines to life. 

Anyways, lots of stuff coming up. 

But all the main assignments are done.

Finals are in 3 weeks. EEK !

Breaking dawn

Crazy epic show. 

I'd say their acting has certainly improved. ALOT.

The whole movie was so emotional

and it was as if you could feel how they are feeling. 

Not disappointed at all. 

And now I can't wait for part 2 to come out. 

The only bad point for the movie was most of the parts were cut off.

The part where they had sex, and where Bella was giving birth. 

Malaysian theatres....

I WANNA WATCH IT AGAIN !

i have loved you for a thousand years

It's been so hard to blog lately.
It feels like there's just not enough time for me to do anything else.

In a blink of an eye, 7 weeks just flew past me.
And in another 3 months, I'll be graduating.
I don't know what I am going to do, and I can't anticipate what is to come.
For a moment, I feel lost thinking about my future.
Nothing is set on stone, nothing is of concrete plan.
For awhile there, I feel helpless, wondering if this is what I want to do.
I wonder if anyone else feels the same.

I've been thinking lately, 

besides the never ending deadlines that seems to chase me  everyday.

I've been thinking about you,

and I've been thinking about the past. 

I wonder how do you live now,

and I wonder if you are happy. 

I wonder if you still write, and if you still remember.

I wonder who are you with now, 

or which lucky girl seems to cloud your thoughts now. 

I wonder if you till read the books that I read, 

or listen to the songs that were a hit during our days. 

I wonder if you have plans to go abroad, 

or if you are afraid of not knowing how you're future may be,

like me. 

I wonder ... and I do still wonder ... if you remember me at all. 

in time

                                                    

                                                    

Made my passport and missed class for the first time in almost two years. haha.
Missed my law assessment and have to resit tomorrow morning.

Rushed to college today after making my passport and went to watch in time.   LOVE !
awesome awesome movie.

Not much to blog about besides meeting up on Monday morning to finish up group project and had crazy spaghetti buffet lunch at Plaza Kelana Jaya by the lake.   :)
Projects and assessments are due next week and the week after that.
I'm going crazy with all the deadlines and submissions of paperwork.
Mum on the other hand is rushing me to apply for uni.

Yes, I'm going crazy and I'm still trying to make time for dancing classes.

Spent a bomb on a bag recently and for now, I have to live below the lines.
Still no regrets. The money was worth it.

Can't wait for the upcoming family trip next month. Wish me luck !

the ever plain usual

watched paranormal activity 3 today in cinemas.
Won't post the poster like I always do.
Because unless you wanna live a longer life, I suggest you do NOT watch this.
It was a very disturbing, horrifying, and fucking scary movie.
I swear the director has like some kind of disturb personality or something.

Will be working tomorrow for Westin under catering for the PGA golf tournament.
COOL ! will be working in double leveled marquees.
It is going to be one hell of a crazy week.
work on both days, table setup and f&b talk on Monday.
Then, dinner service and routine practice on Tuesday.
I am going to be the ultimate living zombie of Taylor's.

Will be stressed out about imcoming events, and assignments one after another.
Update soon!   MUAH !

till now

it feels like my whole world is thrown back on repeat.
i won't go through all of it again.
and just to come out of it feeling more disappointed than ever.
it's a sick game. and i won't play it.

i don't want to feel like i wasn't good enough.
i don't want to feel the need to compare myself
and i don't want to feel like i need to make myself fit for you.

i don't have to explain myself to anyone.
neither will i agree nor disagree to your opinions about me.
i won't jeopardize my life right now just to play along with you.
stop assuming, because it will never go according to your plan.

you

hello love. it's been a while.    :)


I've been busy with so many things lately it's crazy.
Assignments are piling up sky high, and we're entering week 4 now. 6 more weeks to go.



I'm still thinking about you.
and if'd only you knew.
I thought about your life. And the stark difference it is from mine.
Always wondering what you've been up to, and most of all, if you were still writing again.
I guess this feeling never goes away. And there isn't much I would do about it.
Just think of the moments, of how every single detail would bring me back again.
So much hurt, yet an equal amount of happiness.

I will never forget you, but I do hope you forget me.
For I will remain nothing but a ghost to you.
A ghost in your heart. 

world food day

it's been so long since I've blogged.
So sorry to have abandoned you readers out there.
(if there were any to begin with)




                                            

Main thing I wanted to post about today was the World Hunger Day.
Joined my friends and lecturer at college at 7.30am. on a Sunday morning to help pack meals for the hungry people.
The whole event itself was amazing and the experience was one of a kind.
Note that we were there voluntarily. And we spent one whole day there packing food.

It was crazy fun and we laughed and danced so hard at the end.
They even served free flow of beer to all participants.
So proud of myself.   :)


Watched the three musketeers in 3D yesterday. Mum's treat.
Entire movie was awesome !
Even more in 3D. Don't mind watching it again.
                                               

Milla Jovovich was the countess slash assasinator slash spy

                                   
                               

Absolute love. 

The best part was that Mr.Darcy from Pride and Prejudice was one of them !

Till then, hope to recieve proper pictures tomorrow about world food day.  

seriously, we took alot of inappropriate ones. 

  

odd jobs and more shopping !

Have been drowned in part time jobs lately and spending my money on seriously unnecessary things.
I honestly don't know why, but I have the strongest urge to spend spend spend.    :)

  

I have been shopping so much lately, I can actually make a super haul video already.
There's the file organiser from Miss Whatever.
Then the slip in files from popular.
Cardigan from Nichii.
Shirts from Cotton On.
New pencil box and phone casing from the night market.
Hair accessories from the market too.
New thermal mug.  (dad wouldn't let me use the plastic one. all the more reason to spend money)
New handbag which I regretted getting.
New stationery.
Another new handbag (on the way to recieving it)
New accessory from Diva.
Hair dye. (have chio hair now !)

Just to list down a few. hahah.

Seriously. Have been spending too much money.
At least I was working for the past few days to earn back some money.
Was a terrible shopaholic.
I guess my wish list is somewhat completed. Haha. It'd better be right?

So excited to get back to college tomorrow.
And the new classes I'm about to sign up for.

monarch butterfly

                                        


                            

                           

if you don't know this dress, it is "metamorphosis" designed by Luly Yang

and it is one of the most beautiful dress that I've ever seen. 

It ranges from golden yellow to dark hues of orange and red, similar to a monarch butterfly. 

the whites of the wing are embedded with beautiful tiny crystal like beads

and the dress just takes my breathe away. 

I'm being very random but I want to share this dress. 

it is absolutely beautiful. 

wish i could design something similar one day. 

the latest news?

okay..

internship was officially over on Sunday.
And after that, was a string of events that became quite crazy.

Work on Sunday ended at 7 and we (me and Jen Nee that is) had awesome dinner at TGIF.
Walked around Pavillion looking at stuff after that and then went home.

Had to wake up early on Monday to meet up at McD in KL. We're suppose to do our clearance and retuen everything to Westin. BUT, we did not recieve all our appraisal forms yet so we could not clear our stuff.

THEN, Karen called on Tuesday morning to ask me if it was okay if I spend the night at college to help her do hair and make up for the competition on Wednesday. So I packed and went out and bought stuff and fetched sister here and there and packed during the whole afternoon. After dinner, left to college to help Karen with her preparation.

Wiped glasses, cut fruits, and made candied roselle all at 1 in the morning. Slept in Karen's car for about half an hours before waking up at 2 to take bath and start hair and make up routine. Did her hair and make up until 4 something, then pack up everything to leave for KLCC at 5 in the morning.

Did not manage to see her perform because the stupid people of FHM would not let us in. BAH !
So, just waited around from 5 till 9 something staring at chefs walking about.

Met up with Dev, Chee Seng, Micheele, Jen Nee and Benny then head off to Suria KL for breakfast. Was mad hungry at that time. After that, walked to Westin to try to do our clearance one more time BUT the HR people were TOO BUSY to layan us. They even asked us to return again.

BAHHH !! That's two trips to KL for nothing.
sheeeshh..  *mumbles about something mean*

SO, continue walking around Pavi, had lunch at Snowflake, then watched Johnny English reborn.

Honestly, I cannot give reviews about the movie cause half the time I was sleeping in the cinema. I as dead tired. And apparently some of us were sleeping too. Some of them still had work and we were soooo friggin tired. Well, except Jen Nee who sat beside me and laughed like shit. haha.

After that, we all went home and they had dinner at dai chou but I went home to sleep instead. Woke up at 7 with a massive stomachache and then mumma made maggi with assam soup for me. Makan then slept.

And that all leads to now with me, just out from bathe and typing away.   :)

More pictures will be up soon but not now, cause I was too lazy to take out my camera. 

sleepy face in the morning. 

Karen's awesome hair.   :)

KAREN

first runner up

I is proud.   :)